Ghafir

find these:

[3:135]

[3:146-147]


...elab later...

Countdown

I want to start a countdown!

Another 5 months plus!!!

Mihnah

Dedikasi buat yang lemah dek ujian dan mihnah...

---

Mihnah
- 'Umayr SRA [21.06.2007]

Sebuah rangkap madah indah
Menjadi sentuhan penghibur jiwa
Agar kau merasakan hilang gundah
Merawat jiwa yang dihambat lara

Perkasakan dirimu hai jiwa mujahid!
Kuatkan dirimu hai jiwa mujahidah!
Engkau penjunjung kalimah tauhid,
Pastikan engkau tabah menghadapi mihnah.

Engkau akan lalui pelbagai ujian
Maka hadapilah dengan penuh ketabahan

Engkau bakal diuji dengan dugaan hati
Maka siramlah ia dengan dzikir ilahi
Moga kan terbit dan hadir kembali
Sinar cahaya dari ikhlasnya hati

Ikhwaniy dan Akhawatiy...
Sabarlah...
Tabahlah...
Istiqamahlah...
Moga kita bertemu di Jannatu lLah!

Sun

Heard of Surah Asy-Syams?

That's what this song is all about... [Ays-Syams:1-10]



In English:

"[1] By the Sun and its (glorious) splendour;

[2] By the Moon as it follows (the Sun);

[3] By the Day as it shows up (the Sun's) glory;

[4] By the Night as it conceals it;

[5] By the Firmament and its (wonderful) structure;

[6] By the Earth and its (wide) expanse;

[7] By the Soul, and the proportion and order given to it;

[8] And its enlightenment as to its wrong and its right;

[9] Truly he succeeds that purifies it,

[10] And he fails that corrupts it!" [Ays-Syams: 1-10]

In Melayu:

"[1] Demi matahari dan cahayanya yang terang-benderang;

[2] Dan bulan apabila ia mengiringinya;

[3] Dan siang apabila ia memperlihatkannya dengan jelas nyata;

[4] Dan malam apabila ia menyelubunginya (dengan gelap- gelita),

[5] Demi langit dan Yang membinanya (dalam bentuk yang kuat kukuh yang melambangkan kekuasaanNya);

[6] Serta bumi dan Yang menghamparkannya (untuk kemudahan makhluk-makhlukNya);

[7] Demi diri manusia dan Yang menyempurnakan kejadiannya (dengan kelengkapan yang sesuai dengan keadaannya);

[8] Serta mengilhamkannya (untuk mengenal) jalan yang membawanya kepada kejahatan, dan yang membawanya kepada bertakwa;

[9] Sesungguhnya berjayalah orang yang menjadikan dirinya yang sedia bersih bertambah-tambah bersih (dengan iman dan amal kebajikan),

[10]Dan sesungguhnya hampalah orang yang menjadikan dirinya yang sedia bersih itu susut dan terbenam kebersihannya (dengan sebab kekotoran maksiat)." [Ays-Syams: 1-10]

Kembali

Sebuah sajak, aku dedikasikan buat diriku dan yang sejiwa denganku mengharap pada Yang Tertinggi...

Dedikasi khas buat sahabatku Hafiz Bai. Yang bakal melangkah meninggalkan kami untuk meneruskan perjuangannya mengumpul ilmu ilahi.

---

Kembali
- 'Umayr SRA [20.06.2007]

Kau terhenti sebentar
Lantaran terdetik di jiwa
Suatu perasaan gusar
Mendorong hentinya langkah
Ke arah sebuah tujuan
Ke arah sebuah daerah
Atas suatu jalan
Fii sabili lLah...

Setelah sejenak kau berhenti
Setelah sesaat merenung kembali
Lantas kau temui
Sebuah inspirasi
Memulangkan keyakinan diri
Untuk terus berjuang kini

Tulislah kembali
Ucaplah kembali
Dengan kata-kata yang penuh hikmah
Dengan ungkapan imbauan pengalaman
Sentuhan sebuah hidup yang berwarna-warni
Dengan pelbagai kekuatan
Terbitan dari pelbagai sumber jiwa
Berinspirasi seni ruhi

Lalu kumpulkanlah seluruh daya kekuatanmu
Kembalikan semangat perjuanganmu
Hapuskan bayang semu dalam jiwamu
Bersihkan kotor dosa yang manghambat hatimu

Kemudian melangkahlah
Menuju sebuah keindahan
Menghampiri sebuah taman
Yang telah dijanjikan
Untuk mereka yang beriman
Dan tetap istiqamah dalam perjuangan

Ikhwaniy waakhawatiy
Da'wah ini bagaikan seni
Penuh dengan selok belok yang belum ditentukan
Ragamnya, engkau bebas mencorakkan
Indahnya, engkau bebas menggambarkan
Tetapi ingat...
Hasilnya, Allah yang menentukan...

Allahua'lam...

Gravatar

This is mine:

Jerit

Aku rasa sengal... Haha!

baru membaca sedikit, tapi telah terasa kesengalan dan kejahilan diri ini...

Adeih... Teruknya aku...

---

Aku dah lama tak menulis yang berisi. Diri sendiri tengah rasa cukup tak berilmu... Aqal dah tumpul kot. Kene tajamkan balik.

---

Agaknya aqalku tumpul sebab dah jarang kot amalanku. Entah la... Hati rasa tak tenteram...

Kalian du'akan ya...

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Allahumma... Kau ampunilah segala dosa yang mebuatkan hati ini gelap Ya Rabb. Kau hindarkanlah diriku ini dari terpijak dan terjebak ke dalam perkara yang Engkau munkari. Sungguh, aku rasa terlalu teruk diri ini Ya Allah... Kau turunkanlah ketenangan ke dalam hati ini ya Allah...

---

Hati Meraunnggg!!! Aaaaaahhhhhhhhh~~!

Walimah

Here are more pics. This time it's at Zak's house.

(more)

Wedding

Last weekend I went to my friends' wedding. There was only one wedding although I did say "friends' ". Yep, they got married to each other!

Congratulations Zak and Wanie!

Here are some pictures to commemorate the moment:

(more)

Code

Code 19? In relation to the Qur'an?

Can anyone tell me about what it is? It's authenticity?

Comments please.

Reappearance

I am now ready to retake the mantle of my online presence.

May Allah make this renewal of confidence a lasting one. May He make my faith in Him steadfast and true.

Amiin.

I thank those who lent me support.

Barakallahuu fiikum, wajazakumu lLahu jannatu jannata l-firdausi wakhairan kathira.

Visible

What do you do if you become someone whose actions affect the people around you? I dunno... I feel as if I have almost become someone like that. Call me perasan, or whatever. But I do think that.

It's not as if I like it. but then it's not as if I dislike it neither. But I get disconcerted whenever I find out that there's another reader of this blog who takes me seriously.

It's not that I don't appreciate it. Far from it. But I feel... I dunno. Weird. It always things like this that make me start to question myself. Who am I that I deserve such attention? What have I done to let me have such?

The comes the what-ifs. Now that scares me; what-ifs really do. What if people interpret my actions wrongly? What if something I do, however little, pushes someone just over the edge? What if anything I do affects the effectiveness of any group that I am part of?

Those kinds of questions really scares me. I used to live rather free. Free to do what I want. Free to drop anything I want. Free to push the limits. Free to do nothing or anything. All according to my will. But now when considering a bunch of other things in my life, and considering the effects and ripples that I may make through all my connections, I shudder at the implications.

Because I am connected to so many, and because of my loud nature, it could be that any little action I take that is observable by even few makes ripples that is felt by many. Of course, it could also mean that I'm getting paranoid. Which I truly hope I am not.

Sometimes though I just can't help it when the feeling of wanting to help, the feeling of wanting to be of service and to be useful to someone overwhelms me. That's mostly why I almost can't say no to people. Thus taking on another responsibility that would produce ripple-making actions.

I hope to God that I make no undesirable effects on people. I got scared these last few weeks observing the effects of certain actions of mine a few months prior. I really hope they turn out to be good effects taht bring blessing upon me rather than curses.

Allahua'lam.

Friend

Four friends of mine got married last weekend. Two pairs.

Bro Nizam and Sis Safura; Bro Hadi and Sis Hayati.


Congratulations to them. I only went to one wedding though (Safura and Nizam's). Hadi and Yati's I didn't go. I was on the road at the time, travelling on vacation. Ahahaa!

Jealousy

I get jealous of the Islamist movements in Indonesia. Why? It's because of their sincerity and their ability to push and push and push the da'wah to all kinds of people.

They even have "Usrah Pencopet Saku.*" One story regarding this group went something like this:

An Ustaz went into the area where pickpockets were rampant. And he lost his wallet. He complained to a friend of his, who apparently was the murabbi of this "Usrah Pencopet Saku."

The murabbi then went to his group to ask about his friend's wallet.

Murabbi: Here... My friend, an Ustaz, just lost his wallet. I wonder if any of you knows where it is.

Mutarabbi: Hmm... The color and appearance?

The murabbi told him.

Mutarabbi: Hold on moment.

The mutarabbi goes off for a while. Then he comes back with the described wallet.

Mutarabbi: Here it is.

Mutarabbi passes the wallet to his murabbi and the murabbi passes it back to the owner.

When I heard of "Usrah Pencopet Saku", I laughed. Although the irony of it does strike me, I have to say to say that here in Malaysia, I doubt anyone from any Islamic movement group has achieved that kinda level. With the eagerness to actually reform people extending even to these kinds of people. People who would usually receive looks of disapproval just because of what they do. Granted, pick-pocketing is not an honest job. But who knows why they do it, if people do not care to approach them and try to understand them?

Whenever I think back on this matter, I get jealous. Not jealous as such that I intend to take them down outright, but jealous in reflectance of our (me especially) inadequacies.

I really hope that one day, Malaysia becomes an Islamic nation in the purest of senses. A nation that fears God with sincerity and it reflects in the society.

Allahua'lam.

* Usrah pencopet saku is my designation of their usrah. Just for easy reference.

Lawan-Arus

Saya suka bila ada cetusan idea yang menentang arus. Saya tak percaya dan tak suka jika orang yang memanggil diri sendiri sebagai pendakwah tidak berfikir dan mempersoalkan kebenaran apa yang dibawanya dan apa yang dipercayainya. Boleh jadi dia tersesat, dan kerana terlalu percaya apa yang dibawa, dia terus sesat.

Pendakwah yang takde sifat kritikal tak robust, dan tak mampu bertahan berhujah dengan orang yang fasiq yang tersusun nilai dan ideanya. Pendakwah yang tidak kritikal juga tidak mampu untuk mengalih paradigma dalam situasi yang memerlukan pengalihan paradigma. Pendakwah yang tidak kritikal juga akan banyak copy-paste. Kata-katanya, tulisannya dan ideanya hanya sekadar muntahan idea tanpa cernaan makna. Apa yang dia dapat, bulat-bulat tu lah yang dimuntahkan kembali. Kefahaman? Belum tentu.

Saya nak adik-adik dan ikhwan akhawat semua menjadi kritikal. Bukanlah bermaksud anda semua semua kene mempersoal dan mempertikaikan semua hukum-hakam yang tersedia establish secara qat'ie. Tapi sekurang-kuangnya persoalkanlah perkara berita dan isu semasa. Naik tahap sikit, persoalkanlah tentang cara bekerja dan the "how of things." Naik lagi sikit, persoalkan "the why of things." Biar faham bebetul apa tu jalan dakwah dan cabaran jalan dakwah, bukan sekadar muntahan apa yang dipelajari di sekolah-sekolah agama dan sekolah-sekolah Islam yang dah merata-rata kat Malaysia nih. Bukan juga semata-mata apa yang dipelajari dalam liqa' yang dinamakan usrah atau halaqah di universiti-universiti.

Tapi dalam berlaku kritikal janganlah sampai tahap melampau. Sehingga tak terlaksana perancangan kerana terlalu kerap berbincang. Terlalu kerap mempersoal.

Berlakulah kritikal dengan adil. Tegur bila sesuatu tidak betul. Tegur bila perlukan peneguran. Tapi tidaklah sampai merosakkan niat dan perancangan. Jangan sampai jadi paranoid kerana semua dipersoalkan.

Allahua'lam...
Yang gembira melihat adik-adik dan saudara-saudari yang bertungkus-lumus dalam da'wah.

Al-Akh 'Umayr.

Learning

There are still lots of things for me to learn. Too many.

There is a saying:

One feels less knowledgeable as one acquires more knowledge...

I dunno. But I think that aptly describes me. Just when I thought I had understood men and people, more comes around the corner and confounds me. Even those I already know confound me at times.

I guess the subject of people is a very fluid subject and wholly founded on probability. Even then, it is still rather inaccurate. People change, and that change could be within moments or within a span of years. Who knows? You might define someone as a close friend at one moment, and in the next, they're the worst of enemies. A'udzu billahi min dzalik.

Gratitude

Alhamdulillah.... Alhamdulillah... Alhamdulillah...

Growth

When I look back at my old posts, I laugh at the immaturity of my writing. How pure the innocence and naivette.

Take this for example:
Dilemma; Haunting and ARRRRRGH!!

That was written close to a year before. Maybe even more. Compare it to this:
Anticipation

See the difference? The first post was literally shouting, "LOOK AT ME!! I AM HERE!! I WANT ATTENTION!!" Whereas the second post places less emphasis on the eyes of others and more on an introspection of the self, and the flow of life.

"A year is a lot of time for a person to grow, ustazah." [me to one of my teachers after a year out of school]

It seems to me that I am a different person each year. Comparing the me of this year and the me of the last, I believe that this year's me have gotten a little more serious and a tad less rash. This year's me would consider a lot of things before he jumps into a new project. As opposed to the last year's me who would jump into new projects - although old ones still need finishing up - without too long a delay just for the sake of experience and the high rush of activity.

Today, I prefer taking a deliberate pace. Looking at things with focus. At the same time, not loosing the big picture. I now try to have the end in mind even before I start. Although I do not always succeed, to try is always better than to not try at all.

I am actually thinking seriously now about my future. What I am and what I will be. Who I am and who I will be. I now consider the paths of life opened up to me so far and the paths of life I have yet to explore. It all seems like a grand adventure, yet in all of my exeberance, I now look at adventure in a different perpective. It's not anymore the wild fun as I would see adventure just a mere few years back, but it's now a battle plan. Devising a strategy to tackle life and its obstacles. To place myself in society. To find my identity and an island of peace amongst brothers. And to hopefully, become an island of peace myself to others.